The Importance Of Remembering

Starting this post took longer to work out than almost any post I have written. Where do you start when the subject you want to talk about is so devastating, but still important to think about. I guess fair warning, this post could upset some people as it discusses children passing away.

I can’t even imagine the feelings that our friends feel every year their little boy’s birthday comes around. They have suffered the worst thing to happen to any parent and had two of their children pass away. Both suffering from a genetic heart condition that was undiscovered until their second boy died soon after birth.

They are both amazing and a credit to their family with the way that they remember them both so publicly. Tonight we went to their home to celebrate what would have been his second birthday. Each year we remember him, as we did a few weeks ago with his brother, by releasing balloons. They each have little messages on from us all as a little token of our loss.

The event is not a somber affair, but more of a celebration and a thank you for being in our lives. It’s hard to put into words how much we miss them both, and by releasing balloons it allows us to pause and think of him as they float away. A quiet and apt event which we all stand and watch with our friends. Whereas I would want to bury myself away and not be around people, they have an entirely different way of dealing with the grief and one that helps us all.

I always end up leaving their home with a renewed outlook on life. If they can deal with something so devastating, then the framing that we all put on our troubles seems insignificant. By celebrating their children each year, so publicly, they are helping others in more ways than they realise.

They have set up a charity in their boys names and are also helping more families to discover this genetic condition, so they can receive the help they need. I feel lucky to know them and find them both amazingly inspiring.

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