I write to you at the end of a horrible two weeks. Even in this position of privilege I have, my eyes have been opened simply by the fact I am not allowed to leave my house. In fact, if you read this on the day it is published, it is my last day inside, and I am just a few hours away from being able to leave the walls of my home — and what a privilege that will feel like.
Due to my father-in-law testing positive (and also being quite ill) we have had to self-isolate for 14 days due to close contact. They are part of our support bubble for Lucie and as such we could have contracted it too. I am glad to say we have been lucky to escape, my mother-in-law has not been so lucky, and everything is fine, but we went through our battle regardless.
Isolating is a weird thing to have to go through. On the surface if it, and indeed looking back at it, we will see that in the grand scheme of things it’s not hard. You have to stay in a place of infinite number of entertainment possibilities. It’s warm, safe and filled full of creature comforts. Simply because you can’t do that one thing, you realise how much you enjoy it.
The first few days are OK, you start to wonder why you wasted so much time with the big wide world when you can get so much done when staying in. DIY tasks are competed, jobs are done and things tidied up. Yet after a while it starts to drag, all I can think about is walking the dog with the wind in my face or the sun on my back. Enjoying the world, and doing nothing more than simply being outside. Tasks I need to complete cannot be done without a trip somewhere or another and the same walls become tiresome.
The garden just doesn’t cut it, I need space to walk and routes to take, I won’t do nearly as much as I could do but simply knowing I can, is comforting. I start to think about how much I go outside, and how much I value but take for granted about it. I think about the liberties that are taken away by those that can’t go out, either by punishment or circumstance and all the possibilities it brings. Many people go through much worse than I, and I am respectful of these situations, but it’s been hard and I don’t want to do it again!